Showing posts with label you won't believe this but.... Show all posts
Showing posts with label you won't believe this but.... Show all posts

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

The Little Town in Maine Post

(x-posted over at Puff's blog, Generalize This)



A year ago, I moved to a Little Town in Maine. Like Puff, I'm dissertating which is really just a shorthand way of saying I go wherever someone will pay me to teach/research/write until I get my advisor's stamp of approval and I'm allowed to go find a "real" job (then I'll still have to go wherever someone will pay me to teach/research/write but I'll get better benefits and a bright-eyed research assistant I can unload five plus years of pent up exploitation on. What joy is mine).

My travels led me up to the northeast edge of the country, 3 parts New England and 1 part Canada, where the population of people of color is 2% at best and composed of Rwandan, Somali and Sudanese immigrants, military folk, college students (students not faculty, and with an emphasis on athletes) and a few ancien African-Americans descended from eighteenth-century black New England families or some combination of the above. To put that in better perspective, I know all five adult black women in town and all of us are affiliated with the university.

It starts getting dark at 3 p.m. here in the winter. The town (don't blink, you'll miss it) closes shop at 5 p.m. (the really rowdy ones close at 8). Driving slow is the norm and honking is rude (for a native Chicagoan, this damn near kills me). Walking is big, running is bigger, kayaking in the summer (and snowshowing in the winter) is biggest. Everyone has partners (this a meta term that pretty much signifies long-term sexual relations whether married or otherwise) and kids. And playdates. The public radio station plays classical music 80% of the day and there is no Tell Me More or hip hop & R&B station (utter fail as far as I'm concerned and really? All day? who wants to hear classical ALL day?). Waking up at the butt crack of dawn is not only commendable but expected and if you admit you don't expect to receive the New England Look of Disdain.

I think I kind of love it.

Which is weird. Because I'm pretty much the opposite of everything above. I mean--I'm urban. The hell am I doing on the other side of the world in a little town where I can't even find good leave-in conditioner?

But there is something refreshing and familiar--in a Northside Chicago sense--about the blue collar, laid back townspeople. I won't describe them here because I'd have to think and choose my words and this was supposed to be a quick morning post. I'll just say that I got here and I knew them. They were my Polish-Italian immigrant descended neighbors in Chicago's Lincoln Square, they are my mother's overworked and underpaid co-workers, hell, some of them are my mother with her stubborn and loving belief in equal opportunity. And I appreciate that they don't come laden with the same oppressive baggage that I found in, say, St. Louis or Atlanta or D.C. Oh, they have their own issues, and put some of these folks in those cities for a few years and I'll bet white privilege will have its way with them. But their issues aren't the same. Time, place and historical context has given them a willingness to engage you.

And a willingness to leave you alone to do your own thing since their sense of self doesn't revolve around oppressing you.

So to everyone who ever looked on my move to a small town in the Arctic circle with disbelief--yo, it's cool. Give it a try. Life is grand.

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Never Having Daughters

This is terrifying (from Curvature):

A brand new study on sex education (or a current lack of it) out of the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reveals an incredibly disturbing but not particularly surprising new number. Almost 10% of young women aged 18 to 24 reported that their first intercourse was involuntary.

This number matters a great deal, for a whole host of reasons. The first, of course, is that the rape of any woman matters, and 10% of any group of women being raped period is much, much too high. But it’s no secret that a rape can have a huge impact on a person’s future view of sexuality, and that view can be particularly affected if the abuse occurs early on. Not to mention that women who have been raped once are significantly more likely to be raped again.



Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Monday, July 20, 2009

Cops n' Scholars???

this is definitely the WTF for the day...

Harvard professor Gates arrested at Cambridge home

July 20, 2009
By Tracy Jan, Globe Staff

"Harvard professor Henry Louis Gates Jr., one of the nation's pre-eminent African-American scholars, was arrested Thursday afternoon at his home by Cambridge police investigating a possible break-in. The incident raised concerns among some Harvard faculty that Gates was a victim of racial profiling...."

read the rest here.

Read the crazy police report HERE ( YOU MUST read the police report!)

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Facebook foolishness, vol. 2: the things that come up in my news feed

I am going to with hold any of my own personal commentary on this one for the time being. I look forward to hearing your thoughts. As usual, the names have been removed to ...well...i just figured it was in good taste to do so. Its one thing when you put your name on something, and another when said thing is reposted on a blog for public commentary. OH... but I want the commentary!!!! =)

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Maven on the high seas...

in case you were wondering how i keep myself busy while I'm missing all of my girls..... sigh... oh the foolishness... The embedding specs are off since we shot in wideframe but you get the idea.....



Thursday, July 9, 2009

Black and Brown Kids Barred from the Pool (Philly)

From Color of Change. The day camp paid the club $1900.00 to act a damn fool.

[ETA: The Field Negro, an excellent blogger in Philly, has his ear to the ground with an excellent breakdown/update of facts]

Dear friends,

Two weeks ago outside Philadelphia, sixty-five children from a summer camp tried to go swimming at a club their camp had a contract to use. Evidently, the club didn't know the kids were largely Black.

When the campers entered the pool, White parents took their kids out of the water, and the swimming club's staff asked the campers to leave. The next day, the club told the summer camp that their membership would be canceled and that they would refund their money. When asked why, the club's leader said the "kids would change the complexion ... and the atmosphere of the club."

A "Whites only" pool in 2009 should not be tolerated. The club's actions appear to be a violation of section 1981 of the Civil Rights Act. Whether or not any laws were violated, a "Whites only" pool should be something every American condemns.

I've just joined ColorOfChange.org in doing exactly that -- will you join me, and email your friends and family asking them to do the same? We're also calling on the Department of Justice to evaluate suing the facility under federal law. It takes just a moment to do both, here:

http://www.colorofchange.org/swim/?id=1766-899373

Obama is President but that doesn't mean that suddenly all is fine when it comes to race in America. This is a vivid reminder of what we know still lies beneath the surface.

We all know stories like this one -- similar incidents play out quietly every day in different communities across the country. The difference in this case is that folks got caught and there was a contract in place that makes for a potentially illegal act.

Standing up now isn't just about making things right for these kids in Philadelphia or bringing consequences to this swim club (called the Valley Swim Club). It's about creating a climate of accountability everywhere. If we can publicly shame the Valley Swim Club and hold them accountable for this incident, it will make others think twice before engaging in this kind of discrimination.

Please join me in condemning the Valley Swim Club's blatant discrimination and calling on the Justice Department to investigate whether they violated civil rights laws. And please ask your friends and family to do the same.

http://www.colorofchange.org/swim/?id=1766-899373

Thanks.

Here are some links to more info:

"Pool Boots Kids Who Might 'Change the Complexion,'" NBC Philadelphia, 07-08-09
http://bit.ly/90Zyr

"60 Black Kids Booted from Philly Pool For Being Black -- Speak Out," Jill Tubman at Jack and Jill Politics, 07-08-09
http://bit.ly/GkJTs

"Valley Swim Club: Day Two," Adam B at Daily Kos, 07-08-09
http://bit.ly/qbpSA

"Section 1981 Summary," Employment Law Information Network
http://www.elinfonet.com/1981sum.php


Update: Department of Justice takes the case on

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Deliberately Untitled Because I am Still Speechless



This post will be updated once J-Smooth gets into the conversation. I imagine he is still speechless too.

Damn Kis! Tell us how you really feel.

I'd be happy to once the memory of 12 year old girls dancing on stage while Lil Wayne talks about how many girls he wants to fuck that night in front of a billboard ad for the Army/McDonalds/Insurance company stops burning my eyeballs.

Miss Janet, you shouldn't even have sullied your shoes with that stage.

Friday, May 22, 2009

More Facebook Foolishness

So, my girl was telling about this private message that she received on fb from some guy she doesn't know but accepted his friend request a while ago, not really thinking about it. This dude posts a comment, sometimes several, to every status update she makes. She said that she never responds because she doesn't know him. Understood. Seems harmless enough, I guess. So, this weekend, she changed her relationship status to single and received the following message (on the same day):

How are you doing today? I'm doing fine. Just wanted you to know that I was thinking bout you. I hope we can become real good friends and more. I wish we could be boyfriend and girlfriend if you wanted too. You are a very sexy, beautiful woman. I love those sexy lips of yours. What are you doing for your birthday?


Um, WTF?!? Then she goes to his profile for my added amusement and I swear this dude fabricated his interests to attract women. His favorite movies are the movies we had on constant rotation in our common rooms. What dude says his favorite movies are Love Jones, Love and Basketball, and Brown Sugar and his favorite books are romance novels? I know I'm totally playing into the gender roles stererotypes but come on, man. And, if you're gonna do all of that, at least put up a half way decent picture?

So my question is how would you respond to such a message?

*All names have been omitted to protect the innocent and ignorant.*

Friday, May 15, 2009

Facebook fooliness.. (a story in screen captures)

So yesterday a single friend of mine posted an article about marriage on her facebook page. The article itself was cool, but as can be expected, the comments quickly deteriorated into the typical "Good Black men are hard to find" and "Y'all Black women are too picky," Below is the screen grab of the convo. I have blotted out the names to protect the ignorant. Notice the post before mine...

So pretty much, my intention was to a) "give a brotha a chance and b) maybe get some free dinner! (can't blame me for trying) Next thing I know I get this message in my personal inbox from the guy who posted before me... we'll call him E.



WTF!!!!! I think to myself...well you fit neither of my criteria... then there's not reason for me to call you...so i go on to bed and living my life...until i get this message tonight...read on...

i
So now I'm a little offended... okay... more than that, I'm starting to get pissy...so this is my reply...

"Hate to answer a question with a question... and i will try not to be combative... but dude... you don't know me and you just stepped to me with some real BS. you told me you were in a relationship, then gave me your number, then sent me an email entitled "offer" when i did not respond. What exactly were you offering me, E--? a chance to be your jump off? a chance to get you out of a complicated situation? a chance to get myself caught up in all of the unnecessary drama that black men and women embattle each other in? a chance to be "that girl" that brings hurt into another woman's life? it clearly wasn't an offer just to trade ideas...we could have done that on the wall post without needing a private message or things being complicated, or you passing a "litmus" test.

I'm grateful you were honest and up front, many people aren't even that up front. but dang really? And what makes it even more hurtful is that i asked my girl what your deal was and she told me exactly how successful and intelligent you are. I would have been just as happy talking to you as an interesting, non-romantic interest. But you took it to this other level where you frankly had no reason or business taking it.

Why did i have to establish the boundary? why didn't you? Because you have a Y chromosome? THAT is what frustrates me. So i will let our interaction be the response to your inquiry. Yes, it is difficult..because for some reason even seemingly intelligent men make the assumption that i just MIGHT be willing to pass on my standards and convictions for a compliment, or a hug, or a dinner or a good lay... and when they find out that i am a woman of substance (education and looks notwithstanding) they move on to something a little less challenging...often lesser quality, but something that makes it easy to dabble and let go when they are done. because they were never really interested in the substance that i had to offer.

do me a favor though, don't move on to the next thing until you properly finish with what you have on your plate now. And you should look at what you have now...it very well may be worth being actually COMMITTED to.

no animosity intended, i just wish brothers (of all race) didn't approach situations this way, and i wish even more that sistahs (of all races) wouldn't fall prey to the fear of loneliness to let them get away with it."

After sending this message of course, he's all upset and is like..."Oh it wasn't even like that, you jumped to a conclusion, I gave you my number so we could have a non-romantic discussion about the topic that was posted. Plus, as an intelligent woman you should know that I could just be meeting people people to help some of the single guys that I know find good women out there!" blah blah blah....

I just wanted to check with yal... do i look that stupid? Or could someone really be out of touch of how this whole thing could appear of base? ::sigh:: N**** aint ish, man....

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Sometimes its the (big) little things!

One of the the things I love about this blog is that I can share pretty much anything with you all. Even if it's ridiculous... and this is ridiculous!!!

So i was returning my movies to my local grocery store redbox, when i decided to grab a few items for my lunch this week. I headed over the the produce section to browse the fruit. It was there I found these: The BIGGEST GRAPES I've ever seen....


Just to give you some perspective on how huge these things were, let's compare one to a quarter shall we?:


UNREAL!!!!

So if you like green grapes, it may be a good time to check out your local market, cuz the ones here are ABSURD!!!

I know this is completely random, but I had to share... (oh p.s. they taste amazing!!!! Lets just hope what ever steroids they pumped into these things is not a carcinogen!)